Nobody needs sacrificial love


Russia newspaper No 68 (238), 17.04.2001

Maria Tarasevich is actually intellectual. She is a former student of Musical Academy named after Gnesins. Even experienced Bary Alibasov after the talk with her said something absolutely untypical for him: "Well, I used to be an agnostic but as soon as I saw Maria I got to believe in God, because only God could create somebody so perfect… " 

Masha, what do you think of marriage for money? Do you condemn such relationships? 

No, why should I? How can I blame such relationships… 

Could you try such relationships on yourself? 

I think, not. There are so many good things around from which you don't benefit. Why should you try to benefit from everything? 

What do you mean by saying that there are so many good things around from which you don't benefit? 

Why waste your life on… You know once we spent the whole night at the kitchen with Victor Shenderovich. We drank cognac, spoke about marriage for money and came to the conclusion that it's like doing hateful job. If you do the job you like and don't get any result, there is no tragedy in it. You enjoyed doing it, at least. And if you do something you hate – it's a double disappointment! Because, first, you got no pleasure, and, second, you got no result. 

From time to time I meet one couple. I watch them from aside and understand: yes, the man did everything for his girlfriend. Absolutely. But as soon as they appear at some party… Her eyes are always hunting about… I feel she wants to go away immediately. Anywhere! Just to get free. Instincts speak for themselves. 

Do you think it's healthy instincts of self-preservation, which can't be suppressed? 

Oh, yes… The psychological load is so heavy that in the end it appears that the person can't manage it. Therefore, everybody can make choice to his liking. 

Can you tell about the force of women's charms? When does the feeling of your power come? 

The power of a woman's charm is inevitably linked with communication with men. If you contact somebody who allows you to increase your self-appraisal, this power grows. And when you communicate with a man who lowers down your self-appraisal you lose your power (if you love such a man, it is even worse!). The most important question is whom we love. These are my latest conclusions… (Laughs). 

Is another love the best medicine for curing love? 

Another love can deliver you from one extreme into another. So the first and the best medicine is love to yourself. 

Masha, what do you like in yourself? 

Let me think…. I like my ability to communicate. I enjoy meeting people. I love my environment. I like my ability to forgive. One more thing that has always helped me to avoid difficult situations is the ability to see myself from aside. And now shall I say what I don't like in myself? 

Yes, please! 

Perhaps, I am too severe to myself. 

… Haidi Hollinger, my friend from Canada, often pulls me up by saying: "Masha! Calm down! Forget about it. Stop thinking about the same…" 

This must be Russia introspection. There is nothing we can do about it. 

I am fond of thinking and analyzing everything… And I can't forget the situation before I completely process it both in my head and in my heart. Do you imagine a caterpillar without one leg? It can crawl further without one leg, but it stops. 

But there are thirty-nine legs left! 

You are right. You can ignore one leg. But if I loose one leg out of forty, I can't go on. I have to think everything over and find a solution… It's a specific feature of my character. I would prefer to look upon things easier and not to take them close to heart. Perhaps, I am too serious… 

Alexandra Ivchenko